10 Things I’ve Learned as a Freshman in Real Life

This weekend many of my friends from Davidson College will graduate.  Seeing their excitement and apprehension has reminded me of my graduation and encouraged me to reflect on my first year of life as a college graduate. Congrats Wildcats!

10 Things I’ve Learned as a Freshman in Real Life

1. Work doesn’t change every 16 weeks: Unlike school, in the real world your work does not change every semester.  In college everything was always changing: new seminars, new research papers, new dorms rooms, new internships.  Post-grad life involves lots of change, but not in the same way.  The pace of a 9 to 5 is sustainable (unlike all-nighters and finals studying), and more consistent.
2. There is no homework on the weekends: Thank God!  There is nothing like leaving work on a Friday knowing you will not have to enter a library, crack open a textbook, or pour over Excel for an entire weekend.  You can set aside your worries about upcoming tests, mounting reading assignments, and research proposals and just enjoy yourself.  You have time to develop your own interests outside of school.  (Remember what reading for pleasure feels like?)
3. You can determine your own goals, schedules, and activities:  After leaving a competitive academic environment like Davidson College it was a such a relief to be able to do what I wanted without worrying about how I'd compare with my classmates or how it'd effect my GPA.  I no longer feel that I am on a structured timeline.  We are all on our own paths, exploring our own interests, where we want to live, and who we want to live with at our own pace.  There are no syllabuses or final exams.  It's up to us to figure out what we want and how we'll do it.  It's liberating, empowering, and terrifying.
4. Your employment or lack there of does not define you:  Sometimes the in between times are the most important.  The summer after graduation, I did not have a job.  This extra flexibility allowed me to spend time with my family and care for my grandmother before she passed away.  It was a beautiful, life-changing experience that I would not have had if I had gotten a job immediately.
5. There are no frat parties: There is no student union, sorority or fraternity organizing your social schedule.  It’s up to you to figure out what you want to do with your free time.  Most parties will not include Value Village-sponsored themes, red solo cups, and wine in a bag.  It's time to explore craft breweries, go on MeetUps, and get creative.
6. Do not watch Tiny Furniture: Stay positive about your post-grad life.  Do not watch too much Lena Dunham.  If you want, listen to Dr. Meg Jay's TED Talk, but don't get too stress about it.
7. Office work can get dull: "Office brain.  Office Brain.  That's what they call it when you go insane."  It’s important to spice up your work life by taking breaks, joking with your co-workers, and changing projects.  I enjoy my work days much more when I use my standing desk, go for a short mid-day walking break, and eat lunch away from my desk.  You'll spend a lot of time with your co-workers so get to know them over lunch or during happy hour.  Studies show, that you are more efficient if you have friends at work.  Since things do not change as much as they did in college, it’s up to you to take on new skills and challenge yourself.  If you are bored, ask your supervisor for another project.  They will probably be more than willing to help.
8. I’d move to be with people I love:  During my senior year, I noticed that people determined where they wanted to live based off their jobs and significant others.  Friends, partners, and family members are extremely important and should be a part of your future plans.  Although, our society emphasizes career climbing and resume building, you will not be happy unless you have a community of loving friends.  In your early 20s, your career path can change every few months.  Here is the secret: Your friends are often more steady, supportive, and life-giving than your new job.
9. The definition of vocation:  I have learned to focus not only on a career, but a vocation.  Your vocation is your purpose for your life, not just your paid job.  It can encompass what you do for pay, what you do for joy, and what you feel called to do. 
10. Good friends will be there for you along the way:  In the last year, I have lived in three different states.  Although, I live thousands of miles away from most of my best friends, I feel their support everyday.  It's true.  Snapchat, emojis, and voice recordings do make it much easier to stay in contact with your senior apartment mates and thesis buddies, but that's not what really keeps you close.  What keeps you close are the long nights you spent together in the library, the time you held their hand while walking to the health center, and the bliss you felt while dancing to your favorite song together.  Your college friends will stick with you because you helped each other become adults and loved each other through it.  
    
      "It's not quite love and it's not quite community; it's just this feeling that there are people, an abundance of people, who are in this together. Who are on your team. When the check is paid and you stay at the table. When it's four a.m. and no one goes to bed... We don't have a word for the opposite of loneliness, but if we did, I could say that's what I want in life." -Marina Keegan

So what do I actually do?

Now that I have led several delegations, I'd like to explain what I actually do at BorderLinks.  As many of you know, I lead college, graduate school, and church groups on immersive trips to the border to learn about immigration issues, history, and policy.  I have worked with diverse groups from  Wisconsin, California, Washington and Colorado.  Each group has provided their own challenges and joys.  I am grateful to all my delegation participants as each of them has help me grow this year. 

BorderLinks envisions a world in which people, within and across social borders, respect and care for each other, value and celebrate differences, and build healthy and just communities where everyone has equal opportunity for a full and dignified life.

At BorderLinks, we try to do so amplify the voices of individually who are directly affected by immigration.  We meet with undocumented immigrants, asylum seekers, day laborers, church leaders, community organizers, and many more to hear their stories, perspectives and learn what is happening in the borderlands.  

The easiest way is to explain what I do is with photos so here goes!

On BorderLinks delegations...

We walk migrant trails in the desert in order to get a small sense of what undocumented migrants feel when crossing the border.  We learn about the enforcement strategies that have funneled peoples into these harsh terrains and their deadly consequences.

Source: Paul Hedges

We go to Southside Presbyterian Church in Tucson to learn about the Sanctuary movement and attend vigils to show our support for Rosa (middle in black jacket) who is currently in sanctuary there.

Source: Paul Hedges

We talk to Border Patrol or Immigration Customs Control about their work and policies surrounding migration, smuggling, and border security.

We meet with migrant-led grassroots groups that are organizing for a variety of goals including decreasing border militarization, ending racial profiling, ending detention of LGBTQ migrants, ending of separate of families, and  providing more educational opportunities for undocumented students.

BorderLinks staff with Josue, (far left) a member of Scholarships AZ.
Source: Kathryn Schmidt 

We go to border towns like Nogales or Agua Prieta, Mexico where we meet with different organizations who work with migrants in food kitchens, shelters, and churches.  We also meet with groups like the cooperative coffee company Cafe Justo or the community organization HEPAC who are trying to improve their communities in order to decrease out-migration.

Sunset in Nogales.
Source: Paul Hedges

We discuss internal migration and urbanization in Mexico due to an increase in maquilas (factories), free trade policies like NAFTA, and organized crime.  Below is a neighborhood of people who moved to Nogales to work at the factories.  Much of this land was first occupied by squatters who lived without utilities or much infrastructure.

Source: Paul Hedges

We share meals and conversation with local families in Nogales, Mexico.

Members of Orchard Ridge United Church of Christ with Blanca and her son in Nogales, Mexico.
Source: Paul Hedges

I lead workshops and reflections to help my delegation participants process what they are seeing and learning.  We also discuss how to integrate their experiences on the border with their life at home and devise plans for getting more involved.

We take selfies.

Students of University of Portland

This is just the tip of the iceberg, but I hope it helps explain what I have been focussing on this year.  Delegations can be emotionally, intellectually, and physically exhausting but also extremely rewarding.  I enjoy learning and teaching through experiences and hands-on workshops.  It has been an honor to facilitate discussions and reflections where my participants open up about their backgrounds and assumptions.  The act of being present with people as they reflect on their religion, government, and privilege has been truly eye opening gift.    

Mid-Year Newsletter

Here is a newsletter that the Tucson Borderlands YAVs recently wrote to update and thank our supporters.  Thank you so much for reading, donating, and encouraging me this year! 

Hello

Hola

안녕하세요

 Greetings from the 2014/2015 Tucson Borderlands

Young Adult Volunteers

 

We are now halfway through our year of service and want to take a moment to thank you for your continued support.

Here is a quick update on our year so far…

Grace Dover

Hometown: San Mateo, California

Blog: http://www.intentionaltucson.blogspot.com/

“In the last few months, the border has come a part of me.  It is present in my thoughts, my tears, my worries, and my prayers.”

Grace works for Borderlinks, an educational non-profit that teaches people about the current state of the U.S.-Mexico borderlands and immigrant communities in the United States. She has led several immersion trips along the border with colleges and churches.  Grace is enjoying facilitating discussions, leading workshops, and supporting participants as they come to terms with harsh realities and organize to improve their communities.

​Last fall, Grace led a trip with 30 fourteen-year-olds.  Here, they are observing the wall on the Nogales, Arizona/ Nogales, Sonora, Mexico border.

Emily Oshinskie

Hometown: West Hartford, Connecticut

Blog: https://desertdiscoverings.wordpress.com/

“As challenging as this work may be at times, even just acknowledging that a lack of a bridge exists and figuring how to begin building bridges between cultures, ethnicities, religions, backgrounds, upbringings, socioeconomic statuses, etc. is a start!”

Emily works as a Volunteer Coordinator for Iskashitaa Refugee Network, a grassroots organization that strives to reduce food waste while simultaneously empowering refugees through harvesting produce and leading food workshops. She is enjoying the opportunity to work with refugees from Somalia, Burundi, Eritrea, Iraq, and Sudan.

​Emily picks pumpkin leaves with a friend from Bhutan at a harvest she helped coordinate.  The leaves were later used for a food workshop.

Hanbyeol Nam

Hometown: Busan, South Korea

Blog: http://www.bigstar7038.blogspot.kr/

“While staying in USA, I have realized that it is not important to speak the same language. The most important thing is an eye contact, smile and salute by nodding.”

Hanbyeol is hard at work with Community Home Repair Projects of Arizona, a non-profit that does emergency house repairs, addressing health and safety concerns in low-income communities.  During the last seven months, Hanbyeol has not only learned many colloquial English words, but has also mastered technical terms like “weirsbo,” “sawzaw,” and “shut-off valve.” Also, she is interested in American and Mexican history, often practicing her Spanish words during our trips to Mexico.

Hanbyeol and her favorite client, Leo, spend time together fixing his roof, eating lunch, and wearing hats.

Allie Gosselin

Hometown: Dothan, Alabama

Blog: http://alliegosselin.blogspot.com/

“Every morning on my bike ride to work, I get to see the sun rise over one of the mountain ranges and it is a reminder of the possibilities that each day holds.”

Allie, like Hanbyeol, works for Community Home Repair Projects of Arizona.  She is starting to work part-time in the office and part-time in the field.  Allie finds this work satisfying because she gets to speak with clients over the phone during the initial intake and then meet them in person when making repairs.  Also, it has been interesting for her to see how a non-profit runs from inside out.

Community Home Repair staff and volunteers cut open and examine the inside of a water heater and then make a CHRPA mascot during a training in early October.

James Martin

Hometown: Wenatchee, Washington

Blog: http://jamesyavyear.blogspot.com/

“…in my time being on the border I have found that our media and politicians are ignoring the most important things that are on the Arizona/Mexico border: strong sense of community, friendly people and a place of cultural and language exchange between two countries.”

James works with Frontera De Cristo, a bi-national mission in Douglas, Arizona and Agua Prieta, Mexico.  He works with children along the border, teaching English classes.  James also works at the Migrant Resource Center, connecting immigrants to shelters, food, and other resources.  He is an active community member, making these border towns a place where Americans and Mexicans can meet and learn from each other.  James has enjoyed utilizing his passions for education, cultivating relationships and living out God’s call for love.  

James with volunteers at the Migrant Resource Center in Agua Prieta, Mexico.

House Life

The four Tucson YAVs (Grace, Emily, Hanbyeol, Allie) live together with April, a volunteer through the Methodist Church (check out her blog) and Gabrielle, a student at the University of North Texas, who is doing an internship at a non-profit.  We enjoy hiking, biking, watching Friends, hosting dinner parties, and attending events downtown together.  We have learned a lot from living together and are excited to see what is next for our community.

​Family photo (minus Gabrielle) taken during our first month living together.

​Gabrielle taught us how to be MMA fans.  We are now all die-hard Rhonda Rousey supporters.

​We love getting to see James every month when he visits us in Tucson or we go to Mexico.  Here we are about to embark on our Lenten Sojourn Retreat in Cascabel, Arizona.

On May 25th, we will be saying goodbye to our fearless leader, friend, and mentor, Brandon. We are so excited for his family as they move to Singapore and embark on a new adventure.  Thank you, Brandon, for dedicating so much time to this program and supporting us!

​Thank you all, again, for your prayers, emails, phone calls, care packages, and for following us on this journey. If you’d like to continue to support this program and YAV placements, check out the Tucson Borderlands YAV website.

Do Not Hesitate To Leave Your Old Ways Behind

Some people spend Valentine's Day kissing their boyfriends.  Some spend the day bingeing on chocolates with their gal pals.  I spent the day speaking about migrant justice at University Presbyterian Church in Tempe, Arizona.  This church graciously invited the Tucson YAVs to be their weekend guests during Mission Month.  We led a workshop on Solidarity, Charity and Advocacy, preached, spoke during Adult Education and went on a short hike with the youth group.  I'm thankful  for the opportunity to share my reflections on my year service.

The four Tucson YAVs, Allie, Emily, Hanbyeol, and I preached a sermon together.  First, we read a poem called Passover Remember, which we first heard during YAV Orientation in August.  Then, we used different verses to individually reflect on the our experiences during the first half of our YAV year.

Workshop on Solidarity, Charity, and Advocacy
Source: University Presbyterian Church

Below is my part of the sermon.  Click here to hear a recording of our sermon.  

Do not hesitate to leave

Your old ways behind –

Fear, silence, submission

… Then begin quickly,

before you have time to sink back

into the old slavery

Why do we feel the need to create borders?  How do we build equal and respectful relationships with people who are unlike us?  How can I work as an ally with those who are oppressed? What does modern day slavery look like? These are some of the questions I’ve grappled with during my year of service with Young Adult Volunteers. 

I have been blessed with the opportunity to serve at BorderLinks, where I organize and lead educational trips about the border.  During the last six months, I have spent time with a wide variety of people who have taught me more than I could have imagined. 

While observing the 25-foot border wall that separates Mexico and the United States, I have prayed with seminarians, reflected with teenagers, and taken pictures with retirees.  I have led workshops for squirmy middle schoolers where we explore what the words “immigrant,” “border”, or “family” mean to them.  Brave migrants have told me their harrowing testimonies at shelters in border towns like Nogales and Agua Prieta, Sonora.  I’ve wept as a woman recounted her experience of crossing the desert, getting detained by Border Patrol, and separated from her husband.  I have visited migrants at Florence Detention Center who migrated north to escape cartel violence in Honduras and Guatemala.  I have felt the panic that constricts your chest when you learn that your friend’s undocumented husband was just detained.  In the last few months, the border has come a part of me.  It is present in my thoughts, my tears, my worries, and my prayers.

In addition to learning about the challenges on the border, I had the chance to meet people who are bringing human dignity back to this region.  Raul, one of my friends and coworkers, spent last Christmas in a cold detention center, visiting detainees who have no one else to support them.  My friend, Josue, grew up undocumented, and is now organizing with other young migrants to get more access to higher education.  My local Presbyterian church, Southside, has opened its door to provide sanctuary to an undocumented mother so she can stay with her two boys and husband.  

If your Christ is not Chicano, what is he?

Amidst the darkness, I have also witnessed a powerful display of God’s love in the borderlands.  We are lucky to be part of a community of students, pastors, church members, atheists, migrants, and allies who have bonded together to turn barriers into bridges and make our earth look more like God’s kingdom.  As the Bible says in Ephesians 2: 13-15,  “But now in Christ Jesus, you who once were far away have been brought near by the blood of Christ.  For he himself is our peace, who has made the two groups one and has destroyed the barrier, the dividing wall of hostility, by setting aside in his flesh the law with its commands and regulations.”  

During the last six months, my eyes have opened, my heart has ached, and my resolve has been strengthened.  With the support of my fellow volunteers and coworkers, I have begun to acknowledge my privilege, my citizenship and the effects of my country’s policies.

My work here has encouraged me not to “sink back into the old slavery” of injustice, prejudice, and ignorance.  I truly believe that the most radical act of love is to introduce people to each other.  If be build relationships, we realize we are linked.  Their struggle is our struggle.  Our society’s borders affect us all by perpetuating division, fear, and even hatred.  If we leave behind our fear, silence and submission we can reach a state of collective liberation where we are all free.  

Adult Education
Source: University Presbyterian Church

 

Hike with University Presbyterian Church youth group
I am in the hat.
Source: University Presbyterian Church